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“A Little Witch in Every Woman” — A Dark Shadows Story

In the great house of Collinwood, in the study, Julia Hoffman sat reading a book. It was a psychiatric book about new techniques in group therapy for which she’d promised to write a review for a scholarly journal.

She had trouble keeping her mind on it, though. Its language was no more dry and academic than any other book of its type—perhaps a little better, really—but even though there was a pleasant fire burning in the study’s fireplace, the wind was blowing just enough that the sound of the phenomenon called “The Widows” was occasionally happening.

On this particular night, Julia didn’t get the feeling that it was a legitimate supernatural omen or warning of anything. Her rational mind knew that it was just that the roofs of Collinwood had accidentally been constructed in just such a way that sometimes the wind moaned as it blew over the great estate. But she was still restless. The family, and Mrs. Johnson, were all in town on a shopping trip. Barnabas and Willie were in Bangor, helping Quentin with something, helping him clean out a storage unit he’d remembered he had from the time before he’d returned to Collinsport in this century. Julia was in the house alone.

Someone knocked—loudly—at the front door of the great house, startling Julia greatly. Perhaps the family forgot something—or perhaps Barnabas is back early, she thought.

She went to the front door, and opened it.

Standing there, in an expensive green silk dress, was—the woman who had once called herself Cassandra Blair Collins.

“…Angelique!” Julia exclaimed, using the real name that the alias of “Cassandra” had once attempted to obscure. She’d seen Angelique die… but how many times had Angelique died and returned anyway? Angelique, alive again, really wasn’t as surprising as Angelique at the front door of Collinwood, now, wearing her old wig.

“Cassandra, Doctor,” said the beautiful temporary-brunette under her attempt at a disguise of curly dark locks. “Let’s not complicate matters unduly.”

“…What are you doing here?!” Julia asked.

“Ah, well, I just had my marriage from Roger Collins annulled today,” said Angelique. “No magical spell could get around the bureaucracy needed, and allow me to do that without appearing in person before a judge in this county and getting a little paperwork filed. But in person, I was more than able to charm him sufficiently…”

Julia looked puzzled. “Annuled?”

“…I have a new love,” Angelique said, with sincerity—and just a hint of shyness…

Julia again looked puzzled.

“I have a meeting with him tomorrow… but I need a teeny favor from you,” said Angelique.

“And what might that be?” Julia asked. She and Angelique were no longer quite the enemies they had once been, but it was still only natural for Julia to approach this new situation with a healthy level of suspicion.

“I just need to go into one of the parallel time rooms and retrieve a book,” Angelique said.

Julia’s eyes narrowed. “…A spell book?” she asked.

“A history book,” said Angelique. “The history of the Collins family. Or rather, a parallel time version of the Collins family history, where people made…”

“…Radically different choices,” said Julia, thinking of a maid she’d once bludgeoned as a part of trying to save Barnabas.

“Indeed,” Angelique agreed.

“…Why should I let you in, An—Cassandra…?”

“Because, dear Doctor,” Angelique laughed, “it’s the only way to get rid of me.”

Julia sighed. “…I’ll let you in. But please be quick about it. Barnabas and Quentin may return soon, and it would be…”

“Inconvenient,” Angelique suggested.

“To say the least.” But Julia stood aside and let Angelique into the house. “…You said a parallel time room. There’s more than one?” Julia asked.

“Of course!” Angelique said, and she headed up the main stairs.

“…Why do you need this book you want?” Julia asked, following.

“…My new beloved knows that I’m a witch,” said Angelique. “I want to show him that there are good witches and bad witches. The book will show him that there is more good in me than one might think. And there is more evil in the best, most innocent of us than one might think. It all depends on the choices one makes. There is a version of reality where I was a victim instead of a… villainess. I want that book, and then I’ll be on my way…”

“How do you even know about this book, anyway?” Julia asked.

Angelique headed toward the east wing of the mansion. “I’m a witch, Doctor. I have my methods,” said Angelique.

Soon, Angelique had led Julia through dusty and slightly cobwebbed corridors of the east wing… but it wasn’t on the same floor as the usual Parallel Time room… Angelique had circled around and gone up and down one set of stairs twice. They didn’t seem like the staircase of the Stairway to Time, but Julia still wondered.

Finally, Angelique opened a door—to a beautiful library, with pale yellow walls and blue carpet that matched the blue-upholstered furniture. It was a private library, with comfortable sofas and thickly-padded chairs. Amazed, Julia reached a hand out before she could stop herself—but an invisible wall stopped her—she couldn’t reach past the boundary of the doorway.

Angelique, on the other hand, walked right in, headed to a far shelf, and ran her finger along the spines of books on one shelf that was roughly at eye-level…

Julia was horrified that someone might walk into the library—it felt like someone had just left, because there was a fire burning brightly in the room’s hearth, just as there was downstairs in the study off the foyer, as if someone had just gotten up to fetch their reading glasses or something…

But no, Angelique quickly found the book she wanted, and walked back to Julia, and closed the door behind her.

Julia opened the door for one last peek. She’d meant to open it just a crack, but she was so surprised—the room was empty, with bare wooden floors, and walls that—instead of being painted—had peeling wallpaper over unpainted walls. The wallpaper was so gray and faded by the sun that its pattern was no longer discernable in the dim light…

“Thank you, Doctor,” said Angelique, “I’ll be on my way now…”

“Just a minute,” Julia said, and she moved to block Angelique’s way.

“Doctor, I’m not going to put a curse on the Collins family or anything like that. So, please, let me pass.”

“I’d like to know what’s inside that book,” said Julia.

“Oh. Well, that’s reasonable. If you let me pass, I’ll meet you at the Blue Whale at 3 o’clock tomorrow. That will give my beloved enough time to get to Collinsport… I promise you: I’m not going to hurt anyone. Just let me go, now, before Barnabas and Quentin get here, and I’ll let you look through the book tomorrow. If you don’t let me pass, then I’ll have to be… unpleasant.”

Julia let her pass, and she followed Angelique back the way they’d come to the foyer. It was determined that no one was back yet, and so Angelique left…

++++++

At the Blue Whale the next day, Julia had a glass of white wine waiting on the table in front of her. Angelique had one as well, but she was holding and sipping hers. Julia’s attention was entirely focused on the hardback book in front of her.

“The Rise and Fall and Rise of the Collins Family,” Julia read. She opened it to the title page. “A novel by William Hollingshead Loomis… based upon the journal of Ben Stokes.”

Angelique merely took a sip of her wine, but said nothing.

Julia read, quickly skimming the early pages…

In the book, Barnabas Collins relentlessly pursued Angelique Bouchard on Martinique, but she was loyal to the du Prés family, and Josette du Prés, whom she looked at almost like a sister.

Julia looked up at Angelique. “…You were loyal?”

“The ‘me’ in that particular band of time was a bit of a naïve fool, I’m afraid,” said Angelique.

Julia went back to reading…

Jeremiah Collins was kicked out of the house by his elder brother Joshua for marrying a servant instead of Joshua’s preferred choice of marriage for Jeremiah, who would have been their relative from the New York branch of the family, the wealthy Millicent Collins.

Barnabas married Josette.

Angelique was given the job of governess—a sort of promotion from ladies’ maid, arguably—and she took care of Millicent’s younger brother Daniel, and Barnabas’ little sister, Sarah Collins.

“You?” Julia asked, blinking rapidly. “I mean, her? She—that Angelique—became the Collins family’s governess…?”

“I love children…!” said Angelique. “…As long as they don’t get in my way…”

Internally, Julia shuddered, but she kept reading.

First Daniel Collins—and, later, Sarah Collins—died of a wasting disease, in spite of Angelique’s attempts to save them.

“You were a witch in that reality?” Julia asked.

“More of a folk healer, not much more than that,” said Angelique.

Back to the book: Joshua’s sister Abigail heard Sarah say, at one point, that a witch had cursed her and Daniel to die. Seeing Angelique trying folk remedies, she immediately decided that Angelique was a witch, and called Reverend Trask.

Millicent was forced to marry Nathan Forbes—in spite of her mental instability after Daniel died—when it was discovered that Millicent was in a family way. She gave birth to a son, whom she named Quentin.

Julia sighed. “There’s always a Quentin Collins who pops up somewhere…”

“Tell me about it,” agreed Angelique. “As a teenager, this Quentin shot his father, because Quentin found that his father Nathan had never legally married his mother, because Nathan had never divorced his first wife, Suki Forbes. But Quetin’s mother claimed that she shot him, to protect her son. That Millicent spent the rest of her life in a mental hospital… just as happened to the Millicent in the reality I’m more familiar with. Her son Quentin went to England and started the London branch of the family.”

“After so many times that Barnabas has claimed that a Collins went to England and started an English branch of the Collins family…” observed Julia.

“Yes—in this Parallel Time band, there was one. Quentin married a music hall singer named Ivy Fay.”

“Pansy Fay’s grandmother, I suppose?” guessed Julia.

Angelique nodded. “But enough about Quentin. Read on, Doctor.”

Julia speed-read further. “…Barnabas died of the same wasting disease,” she said, shocked.

“Oh, no, not the same one. He was actually cursed to be a vampire,” said Angelique.

“You did that?” Julia asked. “The other you?”

“Oh, no, Julia, not this time. I had no reason to do so, in that time band…”

“Then who did?”

“Who would benefit from destroying the Collins family?” Angelique asked.

Julia made a little noise of exasperation. “There are a number of choices, it seems to me. In my experience, the Collins family makes enemies in every time band…”

“Sad but true. Read on…”

“…Barnabas being a vampire was discovered by his father, who… who…” Julia said.

“Put a stake through his heart,” Angelique finished.

Julia read on. “Josette, insane with grief, jumped off Widow’s Hill…”

“She became one of the Widows,” Angelique confirmed.

Julia continued reading. “…Barnabas’ father Joshua had a stroke and died… Barnabas’ mother, Naomi, in her grief, poisoned herself and died…”

“Yes… Strange how, no matter what choices people make in parallel realities, some tragedies remain the same…”

“Some of them,” said Julia, reading, “but not all… It says here that you… I mean, the parallel time version of you… was hanged as a witch.”

“They had to blame someone. They just picked the wrong woman to blame,” Angelique said calmly.

“A woman? You’re not telling me that Abigail was the witch…?” Julia asked.

“Abigail?” Angelique was clearly a little surprised. “Well, I suppose she did have the most to gain… If anything happened to her brothers and their heirs, she was going to inherit the estate and all… but no, she died of the same wasting disease that Daniel and Sarah did.”

“Then who was left?” Julia asked.

“Keep reading, Julia. The answer will be obvious in just a few more pages from the one you’re on now…”

Julia read: “…The estate went to Jeremiah Collins and his wife… Victoria.” 

“Victoria Collins was the Lady Macbeth behind everything,” nodded Angelique. “She killed the children because they saw her do witchcraft when she was their governess. She tried to scare them into keeping silent, but she increasingly felt that she just couldn’t trust them… And after that, she just kept killing until Jeremiah inherited everything. She had children of her own, which kept the Collins line going…”

“You must be joking,” said Julia. “I understand what you’re implying, that it’s the Victoria—a parallel version of the Victoria that Barnabas and you and I once knew, who mysteriously travelled to 1795… but— ‘radically-different choices’ notwithstanding, Victoria would never have done anything as terrible as—she was too much of a… a—”

“—A goodie two-shoes?” Angelique suggested.

“…Well, too decent…!”

“Mm, six of one, a half dozen of another,” said Angelique…

“No matter what reality Victoria Winters was in, I just can’t imagine her as, well, to use your word from last night—a villainess,” said Julia.

“Doctor, her last name wasn’t Winters in that reality, and she wasn’t a foundling…”

“Well, what was her last name?”

“Keep reading,” Angelique said.

Julia did so. “…Victoria Collins’ maiden name was—Zachary! Years later, Ben learned that she was supposedly descended from a warlock named—”

“—Judah Zachary,” said Angelique.

Julia shook her head, amazed.

“I wonder if—if perhaps in this band of time, the one you and I are in right now, if Judah didn’t make the radically different choice to hide his child in the future…” mused Angelique…

Julia closed the book, and pushed it back across the table to Angelique. “…I don’t think I’m going to tell Barnabas about this book,” she said.

“I think that’s a very wise decision,” said Angelique. “I just want it in order to prove to my beau that in some reality, I was capable of being a good, virtuous woman…” 

“…I still can’t believe that Victoria…”

“Doctor, as I said, there’s a little witch in every woman, just waiting for the right circumstance to come about. Even you, Julia.”

“I’m no witch.”

“Aren’t you, in at least one way? Your relationship with Barnabas has survived Barnabas’ obsession with Josette… and his infatuation with Victoria Winters… and his crush on Rachel Drummond and with Lady Hampshire, that Kitty Soames woman… Your relationship survived his amor fou with Roxanne Drew… and his belief, in 1840, that he loved me.”

“That’s… that’s true…” said Julia, contemplating Angelique’s words…

Angelique smiled. “Whatever you and Barnabas call what you have… one could be justified in feeling that it’s something rather magical…” saidAngelique.

Julia smiled weakly. “I suppose perhaps it is, isn’t it…?”

“I know when I’m licked, Doctor. I’ve thrown in the towel, as they say in this century. It’s you and Barnabas from now on. I want a man who is as loyal to me as you are to Barnabas… and as Barnabas, in his own selfish way, is to you. And I’ve found one; a man who will never leave me…”

“I’m glad,” Julia said, although, again, she shuddered a bit inside…

Angelique stood up from her table, picked up the book, and picked up her purse. “Come out to the dock and say hello to him. His boat should be there by now…” she said.

Curious, Julia followed.

Down the pier, Julia saw a big, beautiful yacht by the dock.

On deck was a familiar face. “Are you ready, Angie?” the man yelled.

“Ready when you are, darling!” called Angelique.

“Joe Haskell?” Julia hissed at Angelique. “Your new love is the man you enthralled when you were a vampire?” Julia had released Joe Haskell from Windcliff some months ago, but he’d had a terrible fear of returning to Collinsport. At the time, he’d said he would look for work in Boston…

“It turns out, he’s still enthralled,” said Angelique, smiling. “I looked him up awhile back, apologized to him for biting him, told him I was now a living witch, and that I wanted to help him succeed in business. We started dating, and I kept my promise. In ten years or so, Haskell Canneries, now getting started in Portland, may be stiff competition to the Collins’ interests. But right now, we’re still in the early stages on constructing a building… getting the new business started properly can wait until Joe and I have gotten married, and we’ve sailed around the world on our honeymoon…”

“Say, is that Dr. Hoffman?” Joe called from the deck of the yacht. “Hello there—it’s been a long time!”

“Indeed, it’s she!” Angelique confirmed. “Say hello, Julia!”

Julia grimaced, though from the deck it would just look like she was having trouble staring into the sunlight coming from over Joe’s shoulder. “Hello, Joe! …Congratulations on your engagement!” After all, if Julia could hypnotize a man with a shiny medallion, why couldn’t a witch who loved that man cure his fears and phobia and traumas entirely, with magic…?

“Thanks!” grinned Joe. “Hey, come on, Angie, we’re burning daylight here…!”

“We’ll send you an invitation to the wedding,” Angelique said to Julia.

“I’d… that’d be nice,” said Julia.

“We’re registered at Brewster’s department store!” Joe yelled.

“Just don’t get us a toaster,” said Angelique. “I am not going to be doing all the cooking in my marriage, like some domesticated witches I know of…”

Julia laughed (a little nervously). “Perish the thought.”

“…Would it be too awkward to hug you goodbye?” Angelique asked.

“Not—not at all,” said Julia.

Angelique gave Julia a very brief hug. “…Take good care of him, all right?” Angelique whispered.

“I—I will,” said Julia, relaxing for the first time in hours.

The hug ended, Angelique stepped onto the yacht’s gangway… and very soon, Julia was waving to Joe and Angelique, as the yacht sailed away.

As Julia walked away, she thought of what Angelique had told her…

Whatever you and Barnabas call what you have… it’s something rather magical…

“…There’s a little witch in every woman,” Julia laughed to herself.

Then she went back to have another white wine at the Blue Whale.

After the afternoon she’d had, she deserved it.

~~~~~~~~~~

Afterword: One of the reasons Alexandra Isles (née Alexandra Moltke) left Dark Shadows was that, well, she said she got tired of playing a goody-goody all the time. She really wanted to be a villainess for a change… but Dan Curtis vetoed that idea. So, don’t think I’m doing a hatchet job on Vicky… I’m just trying to imagine a world where the actress got what she wanted! But I didn’t have the time nor energy to write an entire season worth of Dark Shadows plot, so I summarized. If some other writer would like to write out the strange and terrifying events of the time band described here—perhaps deviating from the events described above, perhaps not—I wish them well!

–Barbara Lien-Cooper